As usual,it's been forever since I've posted.I've been up to quite a bit since the beginning of the year.A major change was my decision to transfer to the Soho location at work.My coworkers at Graybar are among the most important people in my life but I was really miserable working there.The clientele are highly stressed,conservative,narrow minded and judgemental( not all of them,but most).Someone I spoke to recently in Soho,who goes to both,called them douchebag business men.I got pretty sick of the very obvious disapproving looks every day.It was really starting to wear me down and gave me no motivation to build my business after i stepped down from management.Mind you,I have done extremely well there in the past so I figured I could do it again but I was past the point of pretending to be someone else.It's just too fucking exhausting.I'm a strong believer in energy and that place was sucking the life out of me.That whole neighborhood has a black cloud over it.Blech!I've been in Soho for a month and I'm able to be myself,I'm very supported by management,and everyone is happy there!These members are designers,actors,models etc.Young,edgy,tattoos everywhere!Wheeeeeee!!!!!!!!!I'm home!
In other news,I have started doing tai chi everyday,which has had a huge effect on me.The major one was the desire to quit drinking.It has made me realize that it just isn't enjoyable anymore.It makes me depressed and irritable and clarity is very important to me right now.I've also stopped having coffee.Sugar is next.I felt best during those 3 months when I was training to compete before I pulled a groin muscle and I'm going back to that mindset.Having a gluten and dairy intolerance makes certain things easier.I'm contemplating competing in June,as I will be financially stable and able to afford all the prep(shoes,suit,TAN!)Yoga will definitely be part of the process this time to avoid being too rigid and the tai chi will keep me centered.Not to mention having an awesomely supportive boyfriend.I love you Joshua!
My magical practices have also taken an extremely dramatic turn.For one,all the altars I've had for years have been dismantled.They no longer worked for me.I've also stopped doing outer work like using incense and candles,etc to doing just energy work and the thai chi fits into that very well.I realized (through the clarity of not drinking) that I can't manifest anything if my minds not sharp and my energy is all over the place.
I also went back to F.I.T. for a class and hope to get a machine soon so I can get back to designing again.It's been years and I miss it.If it turns into money,awesome,right now I just need it.And,being back on stage was a blast.I'll be doing that again soon.
So,as you can see I've got big plans going on for this dragon year.Can't wait to see how it all turns out.I think chopping my hair off started something big!Releasing the negativity!!!!
